Jenn’s Corner: Pressure
For the first time since I joined JPML, I feel like I am playing well. It feels great, but it also feels horrible. The potential there is huge, and I feel like knowing me, I’ll get really close and then lose it.
In the 2009 season I played in 6 leagues. I completely failed in the JPML Women’s League. I missed one session and my head wasn’t in the rest. In the first half of the North Kanto leagues (pro and open) I started out OK, but went down soon after. On the other hand, in the first half of the JPML D2 Pro League, I did great, keeping 2nd place until the end and then dropping only to 4th, moving up to D1 and winning myself a seat in the Special League.
That is where the pressure lies. Believe it or not, I already feel like I am jinxing any chance I have at have at holding my current 3rd place status in that league, as well as keeping my positive score in the Pro League, which I worked so hard to get in the 4th session. The winner of the Special League moves up to B2, 2nd place moves up to C1 and 3rd gets a ticket to C2. Any of these would obviously be an amazing jump from my current D-status. This is my big chance. That’s a lot of pressure.
My biggest worry was my negative score in the Pro League. One of the minimum requirements of the Special League prizes is a positive score in the Pro League. Since I got back in the black last week, that worry has been pushed back. However, I only have 3 points and there is still one more session to mess that part up. My next worry, of course, will be my actual score in the Special League. Right now I’m in 3rd with about 70 points. There are 4 more days in that league. Lots of time for things to change. It would only take one or two big negative sessions to put me out of the running.
That is a lot of pessimism to carry around when I’m supposed to be concentrating on a bunch of little tiles. Pretty much, there is nothing I can do and nothing to worry about. All I can do at this point is play each hand and each game as well as I know how. On the other hand, my game is at the best it has been since I started. I still have a long way to go, but I think I’ll choose to take the positive route.
Even if I mess up Pro League and Special League, I’m in the top 4 for both the North Kanto Pro and Open Leagues. Of course, I still have 3 sessions to drop down in those too.
Do you play better under pressure? If you were in my position, what would your approach be? In Pro League, I need to just not lose: the most difficult task in all of Mahjong. In Special League I still have to perform for 4 more days. Can you give me some advice in the forums?
